


Scared and Useless

by Dodreamsfloat61



Category: Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Despair, Hope, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-03-08 21:20:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18902866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dodreamsfloat61/pseuds/Dodreamsfloat61
Summary: Well, I've been working on this for the past couple of days hope you all enjoy





	1. Chapter 1

The past is something that no one can run away from. Not the poor nor the wealthy. Neither the hope filled nor the despair flooded can run away. And one talented young man is no exception. After his class and himself witnessed the death of their only hope, the true despairing nature started to bury into their minds like worms in dirt. Everyone fell into the deep pit of that despair, but for some reason, he did not. Was it because he had dealt with his father’s absence and his mother’s death? Or was it something deeper? 

The past is something that no one can run away from. Not the poor nor the wealthy. Neither the hope filled nor the despair flooded can run away. And one talented young man is no exception. After his class and himself witnessed the death of their only hope, the true despairing nature started to bury into their minds like worms in dirt. Everyone fell into the deep pit of that despair, but for some reason, he did not. Was it because he had dealt with his father’s absence and his mother’s death? Or was it something deeper? He had been hiding behind a desk for quite some time. Hearing the twisted promises that his classmates were shouting. 

Wanting so badly to jump up and at least try to pull them back. But he couldn't, he couldn't risk his own sanity and fall victim to the twisted form of hope. When he heard the princess’s promise of bloodshed, he felt that familiar lump rising in his throat. The one that came because of his father. The one that came when he found his mother dead on the floor. He quickly tried to swallow it as more and more empty promises were made by his classmates. Fortunately, he got it back down his already dry throat. Unfortunately, he heard an ensemble of footprints and screaming. What the hell is coming? He turns his head towards the door as the ensemble grew. With the ensemble, he heard the unmistakable sound of sharp metal. He had to get out of there. Right now. 

The minute one person came in, he raced out of hiding and crashed through the window. He held back every scream he had as he fell almost four stories. He felt tears of pain float off his cheeks. He felt the unbearable pain of the millions of glass shards punctured through his back and legs. But no despair. Why couldn't he feel it? He closed his eyes and braced himself. He thought he was going to die, but God had different plans for him. He landed on something that was not the ground. He breathed a sigh of relief and opened his eyes. He groaned in pain as he looked to see what what broken his fall. What he saw made him release those bottled up screams. 

He landed on millions of dead reserve course students. He scrambled to get off, screaming apologies and trying to remain calm. He looked up at his former school, the one that was supposed to keep him and his class safe, almost burnt to the ground. He breathed heavily, trying to hide the onslaught of emotions racking his body. Hot, fat tears wanting to escape from his cursed eyes. Trying to hide the fact that he wanted to mourn for the people that he truly cared about. Keeping that same scared expression he had when he first went to school. It all came crashing down upon him when he realized that only four of his companions had survived. 

It started out small, but then exploded into full on caterwauling at the top of his lungs. He had truly lost everyone, his friends, his family, his school and his love interest. They were all gone. He spent almost an hour trying to calm himself down, of them trying to comfort him. At the end, he stood up and faced the previous school of dreams and still saw his classmates, alive. He no longer recognized them. He no longer recognized himself. He was a scared, useless child and he didn't deny it. 

The next year and a half were filled with things that should have made him an ultimate despair, but throughout his journey, he realized that this wall that helped him not to despair was hope. The hope of helping his friends in one way or another. The hope of living and surviving for his mother. She would have wanted him to survive. She would have wanted him to continue living. He went through the countless deaths of many new people he had met, the burn mark of 77-b he got on his arm, the countless times he had to escape from Monokumas and the ultimate despairs and the bucketful of blood, sweat and tears that he went through. The end of the apocalypse was near, he could feel it. But he knew that wasn't the case for his emotional and mental status. He would always be like this. After all, he said it himself. _Gundham Tanaka is a scared, useless child._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, I've been working on this for the past couple of days hope you all enjoy

* * *

     It’s funny how impressions can change because of something someone does. Either big or small, one little action can make a huge difference. Then, after the impression is made, it could change the person’s whole perspective on life. It all depends on the impression; positive or negative. The story of a delusional boy, with despair buried deep in his soul, had to change one of his impressions on one who had been close to a mother to him.

* * *

* * *

 

 

Uragiri Nensho couldn’t believe all of the idiotic rumors about Tanaka that had been spreading around the sanctuary. They're adults, not gossiping teenagers, and spreading rumors about an eighteen year old boy of all things. Pitiful. It was even hard to eat in the presentation hall. She would always find him sitting outside and most of time, she would give him company. She doesn’t know the hardships he’s gone through and honestly, she doesn’t want to. As the leader of her brigade, she heard the rumors bleed like blood into her clean sheet that was her brigade.

“ _I heard from someone that he was the survivor of the 77th class._ ”

_“We can't trust him Nensho!”_

_“I heard he was an ultimate despair, but he-”_

_**“That’s enough!”** _

Uragiri’s voice echoed across the presentation hall, silencing the voices who spilled nonsense. Everyone was captured in a net of awkward silence; some surprised and others ready for the lecture that would come from the thirty eight year old woman. The eleven that were in the room were silenced by her demanding shout. On the other hand, all Uragiri saw was red. She cared for the boy like she had cared for her last. She had heard enough.

“I want everyone to stop this childish nonsense. Gundham’s a good kid and it’s childish that you’re spreading rumors about a boy.”

She lectured, bringing looks of guilt and annoyance,

“Honestly, I expected better from the people who took down one of the ultimate despair.”

All her words were coated with disbelief and disappoint. She couldn't hear anyone else speak, just the ringing in her ear.

“How do you know he’s actually a good kid?”

A familiar voice pierced through the cold auditorium. Tamotta stood with a deceiving smirk on his face. Uragiri turned her head towards the lieutenant. She looked at him like he had murdered one of their own. She stayed silent and deep in thought. Uragiri remembered when Gundham had first come to the sanctuary; covered in dirt and crying for help. He seemed so innocent, but could she have been wrong,

“Aren’t you gonna answer me Nensho?”

“Lieutenant Maki, I do not know whether he is the very thing we want to kill, but-”

“Captain, lemme ask you this,”

Uragiri could tell that the red head was about to make a point that was designed to change her mind. The smirk and the look in his eyes showed that well; like a cat to a mouse,

“We’ve known this looney kid for only three weeks and we’re supposed to just let him into our group like an old friend?”

He had a point, Tanaka had only come into the sanctuary a few weeks ago and it was extremely hard to get to know him because of his personality. Regardless, almost everyone treated him like family,

“If you know so much about this kid, may as well alert the sanctuary, am I right?”

Maki announced to the halls inhabitants. Another good point but he was doing this because he thinks he can be in higher command,if the rumors were to be true.

“Regardless if he is or not, you shouldn’t be treating Tanaka like this.”

Uragiri countered, not yet done with her lecture,

“Ladies and gentlemen, I wish for you to not talk about Gundham like this any further; it is childish and inappropriate." Uragiri demanded, quietly, 

"For the time being, I will talk with him about the matter and give any information about the subject in due time.”

With that, Uragiri walked out of the presentation hall and slammed the door shut. She needed to plan out how to talk to him. She thought about different scenarios. Just confrontation? Too immature. Maybe just a walk and talk. No, no, it has to be more sophisticated. She thinks about it until she ultimately decides that a home cooked dinner would be the best confrontation. She wasn't the best at cooking, but she was good enough to cook an edible meal for the two. She had been so deep in thought that she didn't hear the deep voice calling out to her,

“Uhm Uragiri?”

Gundham questioned, catching up to her in the long halls near the presentation hall. She snapped out of her thoughts when he had spoken,

“Oh, Hello Tanaka, what do you need?” She responded in a surprisingly monotone voice,

“Well, it’s getting a bit late and you did say something about dinner whilst you were mumbling to yourself.”

She hadn't noticed her mumbling and was a bit embarrassed to know that she had been mumbling about that,

“Well,” she said,clearing her throat,

”I was going to ask you about something while having dinner together, if you are not busy.”

Immediately, Gundham’s face lit up in pure joy. He tried to hide his smile,but to no avail. Uragiri also smiled and said “I presume that smile means you’d be delighted in joining me.” His eyes went wide before he whispered,

"W-Well, I-I just have never been invited to eat with someone before, so y-yes..”

Uragiri looked back at him and chuckled,

”Good, I’ll have it prepared in a little bit and you can meet me in the lounge at 7:30.”

Uragiri started to get up when Gundham grabbed her hand.

“Before you leave,”

His tone suddenly became somber,

"T-thank you..for taking care of me, I really appreciate it..”

Her heart strings were pulled after that gratitude. She could also see little traces of tears coming from Tanaka’s eyes which made her chest ache even more.

“Don't worry about it kid, it’s just kindness.”

She walked away, leaving the boy to wait for their meeting. The meeting that would be their last.

* * *

 

7:30 came quicker than the both of them would have liked. Gundham spent most of the time in the garden, tending to the remaining birds, squirrels and chipmunks in the area. Uragiri, however, cooked a meal for the two of them to share, as she said she would. She also was very curious on how she would deal with him, if the rumor was true. She loved Gundham like a son and didn't want to hurt him or kick him out. So, what would she do? That question racked her mind before the aroma of roast beef permeated the air. The scent snapped her out of her repetition of the same phrase,

"What should I do?"

She spoke out loud,

"About what?"

Gundham spoke, causing Uragiri to jump in shock,

"I will talk to you about it in due time, Tanaka."

Gundham mumbled what sounded like "okay" and took his seat on the closest chair by the entrance. The table that they were sitting at was a long and rectangular, mahogany table. The table looked like it had just been waxed, but the silky place mats covered it just enough. In the middle of the table, a large candle sat, it's light glowing and flickering. Uragiri brought the food over to Gundham and moved to her seat across the table from him. There was a long, drowsy silence, but it didn't last long. Uragiri shattered the silence,

"So, I wanted to talk about a rumor that's been going around..about you."

She monotonically told him. Gundham looked up from the food, somewhat shocked about a rumor being about him. Nervously, he questioned,

"There's a rumor about me?"

"Yes and it's one that my subordinates think will give them higher rankings if it is proved to be true."

Uragiri quickly said back. Now, Gundham was extremely anxious about the rumor and he didn't even know what it was about. He stopped eating the half plate he had left of roast beef. He simply couldn't stomach it because he would likely throw it all up. Gundham pushed himself to ask about the rumor, not wanting the conversation to fall into a pit of silence.

"S-so...what is the rumor about? Is it bad?"

Uragiri sighed,

"Honestly, this rumor is the most childish thing to come out from the others, but to be honest, I can see their concern."

Gundham nodded in agreement, but only grew more anxious as she obviously strayed from giving him the answer to his question. Finally, Uragiri laid down the problem,

"The rumor is if you were the survivor of class 77-b and by that I mean if you survived the fall into despair."

Gundham was shocked by her response. That wasn't that big of a problem. It was only if he was the survivor of his class. Why would that even be a problem. He looked at her and said shyer then he would have liked,

"W-well, the rumors are true."

Uragiri jumped when she heard his retort. Her breath silently hitching in disbelief.

No..it can't be him…

"I did survive the fall of despair and I was a part of class 77-B. I don't know what happened when I saw my friend die, I should have felt despair, but I didn't."

Gundham explained grimly.

Uragiri looked down, deeper in thought than ever before. The very thing that her faction was looking for was right in front of her. That similar ringing in her ear came back as her disbelief filled heart filled with rage. That rage powered by the death of her family. Her husband, her daughters, her son. All dead because Gundham didn't try to stop the remnants of despair. He was their friend. He should have been able to stop him, but he didn't. Uragiri clenched her hands and looked down at her food. She discarded all of the maternal love for Gundham and replaced it with hate. Hate for the man who couldn't save the world from his despair filled classmates. Her heart took over her mind, abandoning any rational thinking with an idea. Her mind wasn't in control so not even her consciousness could protest against the inhumane action she was about to commit.

Gundham had been waiting a while for Uragiri's response, watching her look down deeply in thought. His nervous attitude had disappeared as he trusted Uragiri. She was like a mother to him and she treated him like her son. At sometimes, it was overwhelming and Gundham would sometimes feel the urge to cry. She was kind and stern at the same time. Calm but able to kill someone who ever laid a finger on her child. Gundham loved Uragiri as the maternal and paternal guardian he didn't get his whole life to experience. She was like him, a demon's body with an angel's heart.

Snapping back to reality as Uragiri stood up from the table, the chair screeching, Gundham had felt shivers gone down his spine once he saw her. She was tense and had a stoic expression, it was different than her regular stone faced expression. It was cold and uncaring, it seemed that she had lost all of her love in a sea of anger. Gundham's nonexistent eyebrows arched slightly in concern,

"Tanaka, I also want to show you something. When I do, you have to do everything I say without question. Okay?"

She demanded softly, not turning her gaze towards him.

Gundham transitioned from being glad to share information to unsure if he should have said anything on the subject. With his mouth dryer than a shortbread biscuit, Gundham responded,

"Okay, I will do as you tell me, Uragiri."

The way he said it was not as confident as Gundham would have liked it. His words wanted to be as confident as he was, but they faltered and produced a scared sounding tone, like a small mouse cornered by a cat. In one swift movement, Uragiri stood up and began to walk towards where Gundham was sitting. Gundham also got up and followed her out of the door.

* * *

 

 

The duo walked down the claustrophobic hall. The hall was strange to Gundham because of the lack of really anything. In the halls of his mother’s workplace, he would see posters and pictures plastered on the walls.

On the other hand, the walls were bare and unnerving, despite the fact he had been down these halls two weeks in a row. He must just be nervous, at least that’s what he thought. The two soon found themselves in a very dim room. The light that filled up the room was from the furnace that grew as Uragiri put fire in it. There was a fire iron in her hand, it had a nice looking handle and looked more like a sword than anything.

Gundham cautiously walked further into the room, determined to find out what she was doing. Uragiri stiffened a bit when the floorboards creaked,

“Sit in the chair and strap your arm down,”

She ordered softly,

"Don't ask any questions, just do it.”

Uragiri’s demand startled and confused Gundham. It could be some type of ritualistic code or something so he let it go.

The chair was much like a chair someone would have at a psych ward. It was covered in soot and cuts. Another thing Gundham noticed was the faint fuschia coloured blood barely painting the chair. It unnerved him extremely but regardless, he sat down. The metal arm brace would cover his upper arm which would put him in the awkward position of leaning on the small table. It was built into the table and was also covered in blood. It was more vivid than the chair’s coating in the fluid and Gundham was slightly more unnerved by that simple fact alone. What in the hell could she want from him?

His chin sat upon the table as he turned his head to look back up at Uragiri with his arm tightly braced. He managed to make out her act of semblance.

The fire iron she had were shades of orange and purple,

"That fire iron could easily burn a hole into someone’s flesh."

Gundham thought curiously. Uragiri finally turned back towards him. She still had that stiff, unmoving posture and her hazel eyes burning with something that he couldn't understand.

Gundham didn't know how to read people well enough to be the ultimate psychologist, but he could see the emotions in Uragiri's previously loving eyes. Rage, Anger and Wrath. Three words meaning the same thing. Gundham gazed back, his grayish eyes portraying confusion and worry but also trust. He still trusted Uragiri and he still loved her like a mother. Unfortunately, Uragiri had lost all compassion for the boy and Gundham couldn't see that. Uragiri walked over to the dirty seat, her movement growing quicker as her rage grew,

"Do it."

The woman stared at the boy for a bit before whispering,

"You know, I was at Hopes Peak when I was your age."

That surprised Gundham. She was a Hope's Peak Academy graduate?

But, what was her talent?

Gundham wracked his mind for a clear answer. In an act of reviewing what had happened in the past couple of minutes, he suddenly realized her previous Ultimate talent,

"Y-you were the previous Super HighSchool Level Blacksmith, were you not?"

His previous overlord of ice act coming back through his voice. Uragiri blinked and scoffed,

"Yeah, I was,"

She faint smirk dropped into a dark frown,

"But I was expelled."

Uragiri's posture softened as she asked a question that filled Gundham's heart with dread. He did not want to know the answer at all. He knew that something was going to happen if he were to say anything, but his curiosity caved in,

"W-what did you get expelled for?"

Gundham asked, voice rising in fear.

Uragiri smiled from ear to ear. Not that soft and sweet grin and not the slight smirk either. A crazed smile that would forever patronize Gundham. Her devilish grin faded as she whispered her response,

"This."

Suddenly, Uragiri grabbed Gundham's shackled arm and pierced the fire iron into his arm, slowly carving a word. Gundham screamed in pain as he felt the true excruciating pain of the fire iron ripping through his tissue. He jerked his body, desperate to escape the iron shackles he had placed himself in and let out cries of pain as Uragiri continued her work.

If Uragiri was mainly just giving him a tattoo with the fire iron, Gundham wouldn't be in a lot of pain. Unfortunately, all the rage Uragiri had been bottling up was put into making Gundham suffer and she pushed deep into his arm, deeper than just a regular tattoo. She grunted and yelled about her family and all of this being Gundham's fault, Gundham still trying to break free. Now, there was the visible sight of blood coming from his arm. The pulp of blood grew into a tiny river of fuchsia and Uragiri didn't quit. Her anger was swallowing her heart, her love and her humanity, leaving her like a robot.

Gundham was pretty much wailing at the moment, finally screaming back to her,

"Please, please stop!" on a continuous loop as Uragiri finished the right arm. Gundham tried to see what she had wrote but couldn't get the chance as Uragiri slammed his head down on the table.

That slam earned Uragiri a satisfying yelp from the younger man.

The left arm wasn't shackled down, so while Gundham was slowly recovering the head slam, Uragiri pounded his wrist on the table and began her awful torture yet again. Gundham's screaming got louder and filled with more despair than the other arm. He breathed heavily, trying to stop the pinkish tears rolling down his grayish skin like a flood.

Uragiri finished quickly and looked at him. From her perspective, Gundham looked pitiful. His eyes were red and the same pink tears rolled down his cheeks. His mouth placed in a grimace and letting out quiet moans of agony. His nonexistent eyebrows making his eyes arch up in hurt. Uragiri crept up close to his face and spit in it, getting a small sob from Gundham as a reaction,

"Thanks for causing the murder of my family, Gundham," She scoffed sarcastically,

"I really appreciate it."

She pushed herself off the table and held what looked like a bat. Gundham's eyes were too blurry for him to see what it was due to either the spit or the tears. He couldn't tell. Uragiri lifted the item above her head and whispered,

"See you in hell!"

The bat swung and the pain was short, but when the delt was blown, Gundham's head jerked back. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as his upper body landed on the small, wooden table with a huge thump. As he fell unconscious, he embraced the mellow darkness with open arms.

* * *

 

 

Gundham woke up slowly, coming to a realization on his whereabouts. He was in a small, dark room with many blankets and pillows taking up most of the space in the room. Even he himself was on a mountain of blankets with one covering his lower body. There was also a pillow keeping his posture up. He tried to get up, but he found something bound his legs together. He tried to break out of the ropes that bound his hands too, but he couldn't.

In doing so, he vividly remembered the horrible torture and the pain that was still there.

Oh, was it still there.

His arms hurt to an excruciating level and they stung like crazy, but his heart stung a whole lot more. He had trusted Nensho and even considered her a maternal friend and this is what she does to him?

Gundham slowly started to cry.

He had been keeping his composure throughout the entirety of the time he had met Nensho and his feelings just couldn't take anymore. His breath hitched and a lump practically prevented him from breathing as he remembered the great memories that they had together.

His face crumpled up in heartbreak as his breath hitching gradually grew into sobbing, loud, ugly and guttural sobbing.

This was probably the most betrayed he had ever been in his life. Hiccups and deeper breaths started making their appearances as Gundham grew more and more despaired.

Despair that he was betrayed by someone he truly loved. Despair that he wouldn't find another person like her again. Despair that he couldn't become a god damn remnant of despair and at least be done with the pain.

That last one made his crying harder and caused him to lay on the blankets in the fetal position,

"Why? why? why can't I be like them **_Please! God, just let me be fucking happy for once!"_**

He wailed, trying to get at least God's attention as he sobbed harder. He had lost everyone that he had loved. His mom, his friends and Nensho.

He loved Nensho so much. He loved her as a maternal figure and as a friend but that was in the past. With what little he could do with his hands, Gundham grabbed a larger pillow and pushed it up against his face. It was soft and wet, due to the multitude of tears coming from his eyes but it was still a good way for Gundham to calm down.

His sobs dissolved into sniffles as he slowly fell asleep. It was so comfortable and it somehow reminded him of home. As he calmed down, he wondered if he could just stay here until the remnants of despair were gone. He told himself he would make the decision in the morning.

He didn't know what kept his hope alive, to be honest. He had lost a lot of people he cared about but still he had hope. It didn't make sense. Even if one were to deal with the same torture that Uragiri did to him, they would at least become an ultimate despair. Gundham's eyelids drooped and teared up in shame as he hugged the larger pillow as if it was a dear friend.

While trying to fall asleep, the doorknob twitched which prompted Gundham's response. Suddenly, the door opened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW

**Author's Note:**

> So I've had this au idea on the backburner for most of my time as a Danganronpa fan. To put it simply, Gundham somehow finds a way to cheat the maze system and gets out, while the others fall into despair. He goes through a lotta shit after that like getting multiple burn marks from the ex-Super High School Level Blacksmith. Chances are I was going to add him as like a main character in the aus Despair Girls, but I wanna ask for your opinions first lol


End file.
